Suddenly, life's sole value resides within the length of the to-do list; a day's success is measured by how many stores were seen, how many groceries bought, how many miles driven. Now, I understand we all have errands to run and places to go, but when did the norm become only being home long enough to catch a quick nap, hop in the shower, and do it all over again.
I want more.
And God has given me more.
I know the looks I get when I tell people that I haven't been anywhere, except for my homestead for days. They look at me and think surely she has a problem being out in public, or must be bored stiff at home. Truth be told, home is where I am me. Home is the place I find solace and refuge. Home is my Disneyland, my Target, my little corner bistro, my Starbucks.
Home is my world. I understand a world exists outside my four walls. I understand we must leave to earn a living, sometimes being gone longer than we would like. But that doesn't stop me from asking God to find someway for my husband to work from home. For us to be together, within our four walls, growing together in faith, and spending each day with the man I love beyond all measure.
Time is fleeting, and at the end of my life, I don't want to look back and see rushed, half-hazard moments of a money-crazed, time-crunched, over-caffeinated woman....I want to look back and see a woman with grace and poise, a woman who was a helper and friend to her husband, a woman who found money only has value if you do some good with it. Because materials come and go, in the blink of an eye, everything material can be blown away. But love is for keeps.
So I will continue to support my husband and his heart for service....knowing the checks will not fill our bank accounts, but rather, feed our souls. God has given me a heart for my home, and in turn, I will do all I can to create a healthy and loving home. I will work when I can, rest when I need to, and trust the Lord above to fulfill our Earthly needs.
What does it matter if my clothes are vintage or hand-me-downs. The furniture doesn't all match, and the blankets are worn around the edges. There is an abundance of flour to be turned into homemade bread, and the sink is stockpiled with homemade cleaning products. I don't wear a spiffy perfume, I rub coconut oil into my dirty, grubby hands.
And yet, I have a cozy home and the love of a wonderful man who loves me despite my grubby hands, and a Heavenly Father who bestows faith in me daily.
Home....it means so many different things to different people.
To me, Home is the best place there is.
2 comments:
What a wonderful perspective on life!
Sometimes your posts hit me so very hard. Home is the place I most love to be and lately it seems that life is keeping me on the run more than it's keeping me at home. It's just the way things are when you have kids Perri's age, especially. I hope that summertime affords us more time at home, relaxing and enjoying family. :)
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