It should have been today.....
This should have been the greatest day of my life. This should have been the day I became a Mom, and my husband a Dad. But instead, there were no hospital gowns, no nursery runs, no horrible hospital food, just another normal day.
This was just a normal day of work, laundry, cleaning, bills, exercise, and walking Molly. Any other day, this 'normal' day would have been a breeze, a welcome sense of normalcy. I wish it was.
Instead, I spent the day fumbling around keeping my mind busy, trying to find some sort of an appetite, and generally feeling bogged down. My mind remembered what had happened, while my body felt like an empty vessel, tipped over, poured out, and left bone dry.
But, tomorrow will come, the sun will rise (hopefully we get some sun!) and life will continue to resume its normal rhythm.
So for now, I will snuggle up next to my hubby and watch some silly syndicated reruns on the tv, and tell myself over and over, that I was a Mama once, and will be again some day, whether the kiddos are born here or born elsewhere.....
For now at least I am blessed enough to have my hubby and Molly.